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Nov. 14th, 2008


Boy genius? Or just coincidence...

A few days ago, Ben grabbed a pen and told me he wanted some paper to write on. So, I handed him several sheets of blank white paper, and he sat down. I turned to do something else. A few minutes later, I turned back to him and asked to see what he was drawing. He said, "I didn't draw anything, mumma." I said, "really?" and sure enough, the white papers were still completely blank. I said, "Oh, you're right honey, you didn't draw anything." He nodded and said, "yeah, mumma." Then, he looked at the papers again and said, "it's the sky full of white clouds."

Get it?? Blank sheets of paper?? The sky with white clouds??

Boy genius, right?

Sep. 18th, 2008


Among the ruins

Yesterday, I bought a two chocolates from this little shop. They were rosemary caramel and lavendar. I was feeling very calm, and like all was right with the world as I sat in the car with toddler sleeping, on a beautiful day, sunny, near the water, with these decadent little things, and a nice cup of coffee. Then, I turned on NPR, and heard a report about how all the major banks are failing, and we are all going straight to hell.

I felt like Nero fiddling while Rome burned.

Aug. 15th, 2008


Why my husband is the right man for me.

Tonight, after picking up our brand spankin' new car, we stopped to grab some dinner. Centrally located in the restaurant is a very large fish tank-- just fish, no turtles. That matters because my son is turtle obsessed. Inevitably, after a few moments of fish-watching fun, son pipes up with, "where the turtle, mamma?" My husband jumps in with, "I think he's on the other side of the tank sleeping, Ben." For the next ten minutes, son keeps looking for the turtle, asking when it's going to wake up, so I eventually tell him that I think maybe there's not a turtle in this tank, but we'll see some next time at the aquarium. What next ensues is a fairly good-natured discussion on how I will eventually kill my son's imagination and ability to believe in what he cannot see, versus how my husband will lie to him and tell him what will make him happy in the moment, and let him be disappointed and sad when things don't turn out (aka the turtle never turns up).

The whole thing ended with husband accusing me of "waving [your] baton of deconstruction all over the place." Then we both burst out laughing.

Aug. 13th, 2008


A funny position...

... I thought I would never find myself in, as a Catholic woman: it never ceases to bewilder and awe me that I lead funeral services. When Fr. K and Deacon C are unavailable, I (or my co-worker, mom of tinuviellen and valancy_s) am brought in to do funeral and wake services. The fact that I speak the last words that are said about a person before they are laid to rest, that a family looks to me to offer words of comfort and prayer, that I am considered a spiritual leader in any way at a time of grief and loss!!--somewhat frightens and completely humbles me. What a responsibility! How unequal to the task I am! Yet, I am prevented from being overwhelmed by this when I recognize that I am called only to speak God's words to people-- the beautiful prayers and scriptures that have been used again and again to speak of comfort to the bereaved, and of hope for eternal life for those who have passed. If I can get myself out of the way, they may hear God.

Aug. 12th, 2008



My Crocs have shrunk! Correction: One Croc has shrunk (after being left in a hot car by accident) and the other is regular sized and fine. I googled the issue, and apparently, this happens. Frequently. I tried to wear them the other day, but I ended up kind of walking lopsided... Moral: don't bake your Crocs.

Aug. 8th, 2008


Trying to flesh out why Breaking Dawn was aggravating...

Because I am an adult.

Because the "forever" envisioned in this book is that which typifies the 16-year old psyche: I will be transformed from average high school girl into beautiful, powerful, and yet humble adulthood; my first serious boyfriend (aka "high school sweetheart") and I will be together forever, always young, always beautiful, always happy, always tripping over ourselves to be loving to one another, always having TONS of sex; we will have one perfect child who understands everything we tell her and does what we ask, who never argues, who will be raised to her brilliant, beautiful, accomplished adulthood in a minimum of time... we will have tons of money, we will dress beautifully, we'll have expensive cars, beautiful homes, travel widely, and be VERY SPECIAL in secret ways that no one else can understand (but they will sense our superiority).

This is a young adult book-- if I was 16, maybe this would still feel right to me.
But age (and great, deep wisdom :o) asks: wouldn't this all get really tiring after a while? How long could this kind of earthly forever continue before you need to know what comes next?

Aug. 7th, 2008



Actual conversation held by dorky husband and dorky self at The Melting Pot, a fondue restaurant, for our anniversary (having imbibed small amounts of alcohol): "I am going to ask the waitress if there are any fon-don'ts that we should know about." "Do you have to go to the bathroom, because I fon-doo!" "I am very FON-d of this food." "This place is pretty FON-cy." "Fon-don't take that last bite!"

Also, finished "Breaking Dawn." I am satisfied, yet aggravated. The "forever" envisioned in the book seems like it would get awfully empty after the first 500 years...

Nov. 18th, 2007


A small thank you...

A church friend who works for the government sent this to me-- you can send a text message to those in the armed services to thank them for the sacrifices that they are making, especially as the holiday season approaches. My cousin left for Iraq a month ago, and as I read this I was rather touched, so I thought I would pass it along...

PS-- if the messages don't change as you are reading the post, I clicked on it, and then they began to update. Some are sad, some are sweet. I get a little melancholy, but in a good way, around the holidays. You know, the kind of reflective wistful sadness that's good for the soul. And this made me feel that way a little.

Oct. 29th, 2007

More Cowbell

Wocka wocka wocka!

Ben has learned how to say "walk"-- very clearly, very distinctly. He loves to take walks, and he's going to tell me about it all the time. However, his father then took that lovely new word, and started to say,"walk-a walk-a walk-a" to Ben over and over again. So now I have tiny, loud, angry Fozzie Bear running circles around me all day.

He also had an unauthorized hair cut, which is totally lopsided and uneven-- the minute I leave the house, Craig Sassoon (aka my spouse) whips out the shears and decides to take Ben's head into his own hands, despite my strict orders to do nothing of the sort. Then, the next morning when Ben wakes up, I see the horror that has been done to him. So, Craig gets home and I loudly protest his work, and he tells me he'll "fix it." I again lay down the law-- NO. CUTTING. BEN'S. HAIR. EVER. AGAIN.

Netx morning: Ben's hair is now so short in some places that it sticks up in the air. Note I said "some places"-- the unevenness remains, it's just all shortened. Craig's been at it again. Honestly, what do you do with that??? It would be funny if Ben didn't look like he had mange on one side of his head.

In other news-- YAYYYYYYYY!!!! Confirmation complete! Oh joy, oh joy, oh most blessed joy!

EDIT: Almost forgot! GO SOX!!!!!!! WOOOOO HOOOOOOO! EAT IT, JOHNNY DAMON!!!!!!!!

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Aug. 10th, 2007


Baptism prep should make you happy...

I just finished doing a Baptism Preparation session with some people that I knew from high school. The mom of the baby to be baptized, and the godmother (her sister) were both in music groups with me, and it was really nice to see them. Both parents are supposed to come to the Bap Prep night, but dad didn't show up, so it was just mom and the godparents. And what should be such a beautiful, meaningful, important time for a child and his family actually made me rather melancholy. I am thrilled that they are bringing him for baptism-- a lot of people my age just aren't bothering. And I am not standing over them in judgement. The mom was actually wistful when she talked about going to church-- her church was one of the ones closed down, and then she attended the other one that closed shortly afterwards, and stopped going at that point. So, I get feeling isolated, frustrated, sad, grief, etc., after losing a faith community-- or 2 in a row, for that matter. But, in the course of an hour, through general conversation, I became aware that they don't come to church, and haven't even since they baptized their 2-year old. The godmother doesn't go to church either, and she is living with her fiance, and will be married on a harbor cruise boat. So, the beauty of marriage in a faith community, supported by friends and loved ones is completely out of her understanding. And the children being baptized haven't got much chance of being raised in a faith community... it makes me so sad. They don't even know what they are missing. And the parents are commiting to raise them in the faith... but they don't. There's an issue of integrity there that you want to convey, but in a loving way. I think I did. It's a hard balance to try to issue a challenge to greater responsibility while still being welcoming, loving, and kind. It's a really fine line. People tend to either be harsh and "legalistic," or overly warm & fuzzy & "pastoral," while ignoring the truth. Really being pastoral means speaking the truth in love, and if that ain't a kick in the ass, I don't know what is.

Ironically, as the mom talked about how sad she was when the churches closed down, the girlfriend of the godfather (who stayed through the session with us) said, "they had to close them down because people like you didn't go." Wow. I would NEVER have said it in that forum (even thought it was what I was thinking), but they are good friends, and she kind of laughed it off, but I could tell it really hit home.

I have more on this, but I have to grocery shop before it closes.

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